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RPDR RANT: Season 7, Episode 6

Aedan Roberts

And now it's time for Aedan's RPDR Rantings: Season 7, Episode 6!

This was a juicy week. I'm just going to say that and move on to the breakdown! (in no particular order . . . )

• Ginger Minj: Over the course of this season I've held out hope that I would eventually come around to Miss Minj. Her seeming inevitability made me feel like I was in one of those "better get on board because this is going to happen" scenarios. And yet I can officially say in no uncertain terms: I can't stand Ginger Minj. She went from being a contestant that I felt conflicted about to one I just downright don't like. Did she do well in the Maxi Challenge this week? Yup. In fact it's that general competency that is really starting to grate me. It reminds me of the feeling I had for Roxxxy Andrews: she was competent, polished, and calculating enough to take this thing to the end but her attitude and personality were so terrible that you REALLY wished she would slip up just to get rid of the bad mojo constantly spewing from her angry, bitter, jealous face. And that is Miss Minj to a T. Her little "performance" in this week's Untucked was juvenile, hypocritical to a painful degree, and delusional. And her looks continue to leave me bored: her Eaten By A Bear ensemble looked sloppy, boring and half-assed. And then to go after Max for "doing the same thing over and over"? Bitch, you are losing your damn mind. Max has given wildly different hairstyles, silhouettes and themes in her looks every week. In fact, the only thing that stays consistent is the color of her hair (the COLOR, not the WIG or the STYLE). If you're going to dock her for that you'll need to also go after Katya for her all-blond arsenal. Or Pearl for hers. Or, much more to the point, YOURS. Same goddamn brown wig with a bouffant hairstyle every damn time. You want "lack of variation"? Look in a mirror. Whatever timing and humor Ginger has is drowned in a sea of bitterness and insecurity and I just really hope we'll be saying goodbye to Minj before the top 3.

• Jaidynn Diore Fierce: the judges were off their rockers this week when it comes to final judgements- at least in concern with two queens: Kennedy Davenport and Jaidynn Diore Fierce. Kennedy because she should NOT have been safe just because her team won the overall challenge (why weren't they judged individually like every other goddamn group challenge so far? I smell shenanigans!), and Jaidynn because I thought her performance was, while not the best, not nearly the worst either. And her look was one of my favorites of the night. It had a story, it was well thought-out, and was different from any other look on the runway. The only thing I can say as a positive of this outcome was that we got to see Miss Fierce lipsynch- and she brought the fucking house down. Right from the beginning of the performance: the second she jolted into that epic pose on the first major beat drop I was entranced. It helps that this was by far the best Lipsynch song of the season so far, but Jaidynn ROCKED it and the vulnerability she showed this episode felt genuine and tugged at my heart. I'm totally in love with this glorious queen and hope she steps up her game so she can stick around as long as possible.

• Katya: Katya managed the impossible: she got out of Dumbass Bitchfest 2015 (the first half of this week's Untucked) with my love for her intact. She seemed to try to keep out of it as much as she could without drawing attention to that fact and pointed out Minj and Davenport's idiocy whenever she could. I love this bitch. When it comes to her performance in the full episode- I understand how she won. Was her look the best of the night? Nope, not in my opinion (not with Pearl, Max and Violet KILLING it)- but it was the only halfway decent one in the winning group so she deserved the win hands down. Her Meryl was funny and her runway presentation was hysterical. Minj may have hammed it up more as Visage (and as the villain of her group had the most opportunity for the spotlight)- but Minj also had a boring and uninspired runway. Katya killed it on both fronts as thus she wins. And no amount of Ginger bitterness can take away that fact. Katya has cemented a place in my personal Top 3 and I CAN'T WAIT to see what she has to offer in Snatch Game next week!

• Kennedy Davenport: Miss Davenport has the esteemed status of being the only contestant left on this show more delusional and bitter than Minj and more self absorbed and self-aggrandizing than Miss Fame. She's a mess and brings shame on the House of Davenport every time she opens her mouth or walks down the runway in a visual abomination (read: every damn time). This week was possibly her worst offering yet in both performance and runway. Her Ru was stiff and embarrassingly bad, she had as much trouble with her lines as Jaidynn, and her runway was by FAR the worst of the night. In fact I would argue that her runway would be up there as one of the worst looks to ever walk the runway in RPDR history. Right up there with Serena Cha Cha's embarrassing messes and Shangela's Corn Realness. Which made it even more galling that she was not only safe (due to being in the winning group) but was saved from any critique at all due to that fact. The bottom two should have been Kennedy and Ho. Hands down. And at that point it at least would have been a halfway unpredictable elimination. Because once it was Fierce squaring off against Ho the conclusion was inevitable: Ho has lipsynched three times, this would be Fierce's first. Even if Fierce hadn't rocked it (which she did) Ho would have been gone. But against Kennedy? In that mess of an outfit? Who knows! Needless to say the sooner this queen Sashays Away the better in my opinion. Hopefully followed closely by Minj. Ahhhhhh, wishful thinking.

• Max: the hate the other contestants seem to be throwing at Max is getting really tiring. The girl is sweet (if a bit too prudish), polished to the nines and talented as hell. She's managed to do exceptionally well in every challenge so far and has had a runway as polished and consistently varied as Violet or Pearl. Perhaps it's every other contestant feeling the heat? Regardless of the others I definitely feel this is the case with Minj. The bitch is pissed someone else is doing as well or better than she is (Max has won two challenges to Minj's one after all) and is transparently trying to turn everyone against Max and attack her for the very things that Minj herself is far more guilty of. Regardless I was living for her look this week (her Runway was classic beauty and the heart in a glass box was theatrical, dark and powerful). At this point Max has also very much cemented his place in my Top 3 and screw anyone who comes for her. She's rocking this competition.

• Miss Fame: I feel like Fame's short burst of Alyssa Weird Wonderfulness has sadly come to an end, replaced by sheer obnoxious rambling tirades of Shut The Hell Up. Her (glaringly obvious) attempts to steal as much camera time as possible only served to make me cringe every time she opened her damn mouth. Her performance was probably her worst so far but at least her look was on point (HA! get it?). It wasn't the best look of the night, but it was good. It would have probably been even better if the knife had been straight, but that is a minor detail to pick at (HO HO!). Regardless, the girl is dumb. Like really, really dumb- at least from what she's been showing the cameras. However Untucked did solve one mystery concerning Miss Fame: the origins of her Forever Babbling. Her mother was just as tiring and long-winded, proving that the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree. And hopefully that apple will soon roll right off the stage and out the door. Miss Fame seems to be getting about as far as she needs to go at this point, and as long as we first see Davenport (and possibly Minj) leaving first, I don't mind saying goodbye to this visually stunning vault of vapidness.

• Pearl: Pearl did a great job this episode. Her Visage was wacky, weird and hysterical. She just looked like she was having an absolute BLAST in the challenge and that translated to me enjoying it all the more. She also had the most confessionals that I was vocally agreeing with: the one when she was like "Shut. Up. And. Say. Your. Damn. Lines." had Jon and I going "HALELLU!" and her dig at Minj in response to her shadiness in the Untucked was on point as well. As for her Runway- it was Death Becomes Her Realness to a T. And while some of the queens seemed to attack her for not having a look already prepared in advance (since she had used her original Death Becomes Her look for a previous challenge) I personally give her even MORE credit for pulling off such a fantastically well thought-out look in such a short amount of time. The Death By Plastic Surgery was brilliant and she sold it in spades with her Runway Presentation. If Pearl keeps this up she will also cement her place as one of my Top 3- something I really hope she can do. Keep rocking it, Pearl! Work you ass OFF!

• Violet Chachki: lets just get this out of the way now: Violet's runway was by FAR the most impressive of the night. Everything was absolutely FLAWLESS- from her makeup to her hair to the oxygen tank right down to DEAR GOD THAT CORSET! I mean seriously. Bitch probably should have won this challenge for the sheer tenacity of having her organs rearranged for a runway challenge. HOWEVER! Her Visage was kind of awful. It just kind of . . . flatlined. And admitting that you "aren't a performer" really isn't an excuse for RPDR. There have been six full seasons of evidence at this point that being a "performer" is VITAL to winning. So she should have known going into this that she would have to step it up in terms of acting. I will say this, though: I'm not sure if it was the sheer nastiness of the Davenminj Duo- but I'm kind of beginning to come around with Violet. I think it may be a combination of that and her attempting to be nicer to her fellow contestants- but regardless she looks like she may be coming around. Don't get me wrong: I'm still not really a fan. She's still bitchy and rude and juvenile in an obnoxious way- but in comparison to how Minj and Davenport behaved she was downright saintly this episode.

• Kandy Ho: I've written three-too-many of these in concern with Miss Kandy Ho. So I'm going to make this quick. Bitch was forgettable and deserved to go (three episodes ago). Her attitude in the Untucked was terrible but her goodbye was sweet and felt genuine (though Honey, those were definitely tears of sadness. Don't kid yourself). Goodbye Ho! I will miss forgetting you were even there.

Final notes:

• I was never really a big fan of that Ariana Grande song (or Ariana Grande herself, to be honest) until last night. That song was tailor made for epic lip-synch battles and I'm so happy that she was willing to grant RPDR permission to use it. Ariana Grande has gone from Forgettable Pop Star Tartlet to Adorable Pop Princess I'm Kind Of Rooting For with this simple appearance. Her genuine love for this show was radiating from her every time the camera panned to her and that made me like her more than I ever thought I would.

• Miss Minj and Kennedy are both charisma reflector beams. They were so nasty, hypocritical and juvenile in the Untucked that they made Violet look downright pleasant. That's some real talent there, girls.

• NEXT WEEK IS SNATCH GAME!!!!!!!! YESSSSSSSSSS!!!!!